The Choices

My husband and I manage an interesting marriage.  I mean, we both kind of fall under the category of “first-born” even though he’s technically the baby of his family.  (Large age difference between him and his closest sibling “qualifies” him as a first-born.)

Which, if I “read” it correctly means that we are both bossy, opinionated and stubborn.

I can totally see that for him. 

I, on the other hand, am merely “convinced of the correctness of my thinking”.  (Hee, hee!  I totally stole that line from “Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman“.)

So, needless to say, there are times in our marriage when things get a bit. . .disturbed.

I have realized over the years that Jay just has to have the final say in anything.  (Everything, really.)

The man doesn’t even have the decency to recognize areas of responsibility that should fall to me. . .(like decorating, hanging pictures, picking colors, etc.)

Which means that every little decision can be massively time-consuming, frustrating, and downright impossible.

Except, I figured out a little something that helps everything along.

While Jay has to have the final say, he doesn’t necessarily care about the process.  So, he’s perfectly fine allowing that to fall on me.

Which, by the way, I hate.  I mean, I truly despise being presented with a 100 thousand options and wheedling it down to two or three.

However, regardless of the fact that I don’t like it, it would have to be done. . . and it is a heck of a lot easier to do it by myself than to have to deal with him there too.

So, I weed out all the options and present my husband with two (rarely three).

Now, according to my husband, I almost always make one of the choices an off-the-wall option. . .so, obviously, he would take the option that I would have made all by myself.

I truly don’t believe that is the case; however, I do have “expensive” taste, and it never fails that there is one more expensive option than the other.

But, what can you say?

Yet, I am trying to get better.  Honest!

Jay is trying to get better too.  It is a huge struggle for him, and it is almost painful to watch.


We spent two to three weeks debating over whether to have an island in the kitchen, as well as whether to have a single basin vs. double basin sink.

In the end, the poor man just gave over both decisions to me.  The island was the easier of the two to give to me, because I set up a mock kitchen on the grass and used chairs for the appliances and such and he finally realized that if we put an island in the kitchen it would be terribly tight.

The sink. . .he’s not happy about at all.  I mean, he truly wants a double basin sink.  And for the record, so do I.  However, at this point (on paper), I’m not seeing the ability to give up storage space just so I can add a second basin.

It’s a mite bit disturbing to realize that we are doing all this work yet, not really gaining anything other than open-functionality.  (Which is huge, don’t get me wrong!)  And, in the end, things may change quite a bit, depending on what happens when the demolition work is done.  So, we are both having to remain. . .”open-minded and flexible”.

Which both of us *do* Oh-So-Well!


Anyway, as I mentioned yesterday, I was on a mission to find kitchen tile.  I actually went with something very specific in mind.  Which, based on past experience should have let me know the instant I thought of it, that I would be unable to find it.  And, would you look at that!  I didn’t!

However, I was able to discover some items I liked / loved.

I present you, dear readers, with the same options I presented my husband.  (And for the record, the tiles were within pennies of each other.)

Option A: (left side) has more of a blue-grey tile and a cinnamon / rust colored “fiber “counter-top

Option B: (right side) has more of an earthy swirl tile, and a green “marble-y” counter-top

The non-option is the (center) mosaic backsplash tile that I absolutely fell in love with on first sight.  (Jay did too. . .wasn’t that handy!)


One comment on “The Choices

  1. D says:

    lol. Sounds like DH and I when we remodeled our kitchen and did our patio. I ended up using Google Sketch to do a design so he would ‘see it my way’…..the backsplash tile for our kitchen was picked months after we finished the structure, btw…we just could not find the tile of the look I was going for. Toward the end he was just ready to pick anything. (I did find it and he was very happy with the end result).

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