My older children are now in that realm of possible date candidates. (To be perfectly honest, they’ve been in that realm for a number of years; but they have decided not to act upon the privilege.)
Because I am a true hater of “expectations”, I let my kids know right up front what they are.
I will love anyone they choose. I don’t need to know any of the gory dating details, or anything else, unless they choose to tell me. If they bring home a wife, that’s all the better, because that means I avoid all that mess (and the whole wedding business too).
That said, I have some serious dating gripes. For example, the whole “ask the father for permission” business. I hate that one! I asked someone, a mother of daughters, why they felt it was important, and she insulted me by saying it was to protect her daughters.
Ummm, HELLO?! My son is no less precious to me than your daughter is to you!
So, I’ve told my boys that should they decide to date a girl with such a practice in their house, then the girl needs to come ask me for permission for her to date my son.
They rolled their eyeballs at me. . .
(And you wanna know something? Any girl reading this would roll their eyeballs too, because if that were to occur their man’s testes would be called into question.)
But, here’s another reason to dislike the whole asking permission business: it is archaic!
As in, it started in the dark ages. And do you know that when it started a dowry was required. Do you know why? Because females were considered such a worthless drain on a household that a man had to be PAID to take her off her father’s hands!
Then, there was the period when the father’s choice was because of what the potential son-in-law would bring to the father’s house (respect, name, fortune).
Honestly, females, at this point are you feeling “precious”, or merely like cattle???
I also find it odd that I don’t know any secular families that practice this. I’m not saying they aren’t out there, just that I don’t personally know of anyone. One mom tried to tell me it was commanded in the Bible. . . Umm, to my knowledge our Heavenly Father has always allowed us to make our own choices. It is man who implements stupidity.
I kinda have strong thoughts on this subject.
Here is one final thought that I have. . .What if the girl truly likes / loves my son? What if the father says “no”?
Honestly, I hope should that ever be the case, that said girl tells her father to go screw himself. However, should she not be so inclined to do so then she is obviously not the one for my son.